Flying above the ‘ego’

After hypnosis this morning, I held the raptor feather and continued on listening to the trance drumming tracks, letting my brainwaves bring me as close to an alpha (or even theta) state as I could. I invited kite into my circle, but suddenly found that I was near the base of a high mountain. Cut into the side of the mountain was a winding road. I had my wings out. But apparently, I wasn’t supposed to fly straight to the peak immediately. I had to follow the road.

It forced me to learn how to balance myself a lot – needing to control the merest tilt of my wings as the circles became a lot smaller.

When I reached the top, it was just enough for my butt to sit on, so I did. Kite rested on my thigh. Kiesh’ra somehow managed to ‘hover’ behind me.

For the first time, K spoke directly to my mind. With words! I was so startled I whirled around and demanded of him, “Did you just speak to me?”

He said yes, and explained that for the past five years, he couldn’t speak with me clearly because my ‘ego’ and whatever else were cluttering my mind. It was only ‘here,’ that I’d risen above my ego.

And it was true. I sensed the seemingly-fragile network which linked all other possible worlds to me, to my present, to me NOW. Kite and Kiesh’ra, knowing what I have been trying to manifest, made me pull those worlds to myself and to eat them, to integrate them into my present.

I didn’t feel anything as I ate them, but after a few minutes, I felt the worlds suddenly ‘dissolve’ and integrate into me. It was warm and fuzzy.

I love Kiesh’ra. He came to me and protected an idiot kid who opened herself asking for protectors and guides and nearly got herself eaten by some giant spider thing (scary shit) about five, six years ago, and has stuck around ever since with little thanks. I sometimes forget to talk to him as I’m immersed in the clutter of physical life, but he is still around, protecting me and the ones I love from a lot of attacks.

Beer soon. And more smudging on the feather. Both he and kite loved it. =)