(Soulbonding) The management of fire and anger | Lighting of candles

Two weeks ago, Fire Lord Zuko and I had a small exercise which went a little bit off tangent – the after effects were a little bit unpleasant, and both of us didn’t expect that to happen, although it seems a logical enough aftermath.

What happened was that Zuko thought it would be a good idea to teach me where the source of all my rage and passion and everything intense came from, and how to bring it up and direct it in a safer way. Of course, all these stem a lot from one of the strongest points of energy in the body, the dan1 tian2 in Mandarin, known also as the base chakra.

He taught me to acknowledge that I have a much, much larger source of rage than a lot of others, and to control that rage, I have to learn how to redirect it in a safe manner. So he made me release all the molten fire from my dan tian, and let it fill my whole body, first down to my thighs and groin and feet, and from there rising upwards, spilling over into my arms and palms, and then rising more into my head till my whole body was glowing. He taught me a lesson on how to balance the fire just at the edge of my body, with the tension balanced just nice enough so that the fire didn’t coalesce back into my base chakra, but also didn’t explode outwards suddenly.

The whole lesson took almost forty-five minutes, and when he finally allowed me to collect the fire back into a more manageable ball, my body had an averse reaction of nausea and dazedness which was most unpleasant. He felt extremely sorry after that, but I developed a fear of the nausea and hadn’t trained with him for the past two weeks until today.

However, he had also taught me a sort of half-dance, half-martial arts which allowed me to release a lot of the fire/rage through my fists or palms outwardly, without attacking anything in particular, much like making an opponent winded before attacking (just that this is simply making the rage winded). It’s a very circular dance, with fire lashing out like whips but keeping them in circular motion, much like those Chinese dances using long flying ribbons. In a way.

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Today, I was pissed off about something and almost ready to go insane with rage all over again with nothing to lash out. Perhaps, having been a very very angry person before, Zuko understood what I was going through, and felt empathy for me enough to keep an almost constant rapport between us so that he might help whenever he can, or whenever I needed it.

So, he actually kind of dragged me into my “mindspace” of sorts, and I saw hundreds upon hundreds of white and fat candles placed at various heights in neat rows. He knew that the dance wouldn’t be enough this time, that I needed to direct my rage and fire at something. So he told me to use only my second and third fingers of each hand in the traditional Chinese swordfighting martial arts style, and light each and every candle in sequence.

There were a few times during the lighting of those candles I lost it, and he made me focus my rage on him by rapidly holding up the candles and making me light them with precision while he held them, all the while trusting I wouldn’t hurt him with my own fire.

Apparently, as he explained to me after that, the candles are somewhat a representation of my rage, or the fuel of my rage. The flame is the attack, the point of the candle which can burn and hurt. It is up to me how big or small I keep the flames, or how I use the whole candle as I wish to. I still haven’t grasped the whole concept in my mind, and this will take further experimenting with.

All in all, I have to thank Zuko for being a willing master. I have been better able to control my rage without lashing out with the same frequency or intensity since he has taught me.

(Soulbonding) Lessons of fire and air

What basic thing Zuko taught me last night was a reminder, that fire was not just fire. It is made of air and fire – the fuel and the effect. He actually told me what firebending really was. It was bending energy around a funnel of air, using air to both fuel and trap the energy between two layers as a sort of direction.

That was pretty logical.

What confused me was the internal energy of bending itself. According to the wiki page on Avatar, the Fire Nation’s martial arts style was based on Northern Shaolin kung fu.

I have absolutely no experience with that form of martial arts. What I have learn intensively are simply taekwondo, and taichi – one hard form, and one soft form. So I was taught to visualize and combine both of them in a sense of energy direction. I probably couldn’t replicate it in the real world (for now?) but it did achieve something: it focused my mind a lot more than other techniques I’ve learnt or been taught.

(Soulbonding | Meditation | Manifestations | Training)

Soulbonding

With my family having somehow taken leave of me about three years ago, with the barest contact, and with sporadic involvement, I have only spoken with Dick and Bruce a few times over the past year. Somehow, the connection and rapport isn’t there anymore. Perhaps, like Dick did, I had to leave the nest and find my own way. My own suit which they created for me is still unworn; the emblem has been collecting dust over the years in the display case which holds the suit (I’m sure Alfred dusts it, but still).

I’ve donned a new armor half my own creation, and half gifted to me by K and by the Hellspawn (no other name which to call him by)who jointly created it, from helm down to sword.

Strangely enough, with everything which have been going on lately, I find myself asking for help from one of the most unlikely sources and people: Zuko of the Fire Nation, from the Avatar series. And it is not Prince Zuko who came to me, the lost and young Zuko of the series. It was Fire Lord Zuko, well-matured into his years (around 20 plus years, my age now), with more wisdom and wit from having governed his nation for years, who came to me offering his wisdom.

Ironically, I am of fire and air. And he offered me a very basic instruction when he came: fire and air have to go together. I’m a martial artist and he drew upon my martial arts background; I think he recognized in me the same fire soul which he has.

He is an unlikely candidate. Yet, I am more than intrigued by him. And perhaps he will make a good friend in times to come.

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Manifestations

Having kind of linked certain theories between the Seth materials and my own beliefs in the Many Worlds Theory, I’ve kind of started my own shaping of the reality I want, exploring various worlds where I exist and where I’ve achieved the thing/s I want, and incorporated those into the shape of my own mould now. We’ll see how things go in times to come.

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Armor/Training

With Zuko’s help and guidance, I actually manifested and donned my armor in one of the quickest times I’ve tried. His basic teaching of how fire and air blended together in a form of movement and martial art which is neither hard like earth, nor soft like water, but a blend of both, really helped.